Helping Your Child Deal with the Death of a Beloved Pet
A special bond often exists between a child and their pet. It doesn’t matter if it is a cat or dog of pot-bellied pig. When a pet is a companion and confidante for the child, the connection they share is so sweet. A child receives love without strings and knows that their secrets, hopes and dreams are held in the strictest of confidence. This is what makes the death of a pet so devastating to a child.
Children will not always understand why their pet had to die and as the parent, it is your duty to try and help them. Whatever you do though, do not lie to them because they will eventually find out the truth about their pet’s death. Sometimes, the pet could have run away to die or the veterinarian may have had to euthanize it after a debilitating injury or illness. A parent’s job is a tough one, particularly when consoling a child who is devastated by a pet’s death.
A Learning Experience
Death can be a learning experience for both you and your child. You can explain about the natural progression of death and how and why it happens. Kids do seem to expect death when something is really old so if the pet died of old age, the child may well be able to handle it fairly well. However, when a pet is killed by an accident, dies of a disease or must be euthanized, the idea of death is much harder to grasp.
Children think in terms of black and white so be prepared to answer a lot of questions, particularly the reason why the veterinarian could not save their pet’s life. It may take a while for your child to understand that not all pets can be cured or saved. Sometimes, it is just their time to die. Explain that vets do everything they can to save the lives of animals but sometimes it just isn’t possible. If you must explain euthanasia to them, ask your child whether or not they would want their pet to live in pain for the rest of its life. Of course, they would answer no.
Coping with the Loss
One of the ways that children can better cope with the loss of a pet is to allow them to hold a memorial service for it so that they can say goodbye properly. If the pet was euthanized, ask the vet if it would be possible to obtain the body for burial. Give your child options on where to bury their beloved pet and whether or not they would want to add something to the burial such as a toy that belonged to the pet or perhaps a photo of the child with the pet. Treat the death of the pet as a real death of a family member. Follow your child’s lead in terms of the memorial service. They may want to say a few words or ask you to do it.
Whatever you do, do not tell your child that they can have a new pet to replace the one who died. This will likely upset them and they will think that you did not care about their beloved animal. Instead, wait a while and allow your child to grieve properly. Chances are that they will eventually approach you for another pet. When this happens, tell them that their dead pet will always be missed and loved and that you all have room in your hearts for another pet. This will help in acknowledging their feelings.
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Originally posted 2009-03-04 12:15:13.
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Tags: cat health, dog health, euthanasia, grief pet death, grief pet loss, helping child deal with death of pet, helping child deal with loss of pet, pet death, pet loss, pets, vet, veterinarian
November 06, 2009
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November 07, 2009
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